This is here and this is now. I have been called many things to many different people. This list includes, but not limited to: son, brother, friend, lover, junkie, loser, the person formally known as myself. You see, there is something about drugs that makes you lower your standards. Standards that include whores who wait for you to sleep so they can steal your drugs, assuming that the blow job they gave you was enough to compensate for the loss. Standards that leave you accepting a lifestyle that once made you vomit. Standards that allow you to make pretend friendships with others like you. Standards that you lower and make you ashamed to see your friends and family. I have been high (really fucking high) and I have been low (really fucking low) and I don’t know which I prefer to remember the most. I know my name is Benny, but I am still trying to find out who and what I am all about. – Benny

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